Art in its Abstract

Richard Diebenkorn (foundation in Berkeley) - Californian. Died in 1993.
- Ocean Park #48 $13.5m, 1971 painting.

Catalogue raisonne: genuine works (comprehensive list)

--

Others:
Clare McAndrew, founder of Art Economics (consultancy)
Sharon Flescher, director of International Foundation Foundation for Art Research
Veronique Wiesinger, chief curator at France's ministry of culture (Alberto Giacometti)
***Ronald Spencer, art lawyer & author: "The Expert and the Object"
- scholars reluctant to give opinion, forgers finds it easier to circulate fakes, buyers pays less for art.
Christopher Van de Weghe, NY art dealer - good new catalogue raisonne of Modigliani drawings published... Price would rise by 1/5 (20%)

Andy Warhol Foundation dissolved due to $7m lawsuit
Estate of Jean-Michel Basquiat & Keith Haring Foundation & Roy Lichtenstein Foundation - stopped.
Foundation of Alberto et Annette Giocometti

Jackson Pollock (mimicking Rembrandt)
Marc Restellini (Parisian art historian), head of Pinacotheque de Paris - Amedeo Modigliani, died young 1920; one painting fetched $69m at Sotheby's auction 2 years ago.

Isamu Noguchi, Japanses-American sculptor. (project manager: Shaina Larrivee)

Shin-Yi Yang, curator in Beijing : living artists make more money as they can personally assure the paintings themselves.

Courtauld Institute of Art London - authenticate 600 paintings by Francis Bacon (died 1992)

Scatterbrained

In moments of deliberation, when I am forcing myself to write, nothing would come out.

---

I've realised that the state of being self-confident and being overwhelmed by self-doubt is just a flick of a switch away.

---

I've just came back from stalking you. I acknowledge you, you should be grateful. I want you to know that you are my nemesis. In this life I want to make sure that I am ahead of you in my life's race.

I really need discipline. I really need structure. I really need control.

Here is a list of things that I really want to do.
1) learn Jap
2) learn German
3) watch TED everyday
4) keep up with Malaysia's politics
5) Find time to read fiction books

6) have an organised list of quotes

Quarrel 10 & 17

Giving.

We quarrelled because of money and money management. I owe her money, she didn't ask for it and I took too long to repay her. This is totally my fault. I should make her feel bad.

Lessons: things that you can't afford, you should never want with your own strength. Things that you don't have the capacity, don't accept it.

She is more than I can physically handle.
My physical is growing slower than my mental and spiritual. My willpower is strong, but not manifested by my fruits. It should soon. It must.

I know where those £3000 went. It went to the season of courting and the holidays that we went to. It went to all the trips and hols that we went to.

Memory

When I am trying to remember nothing comes back.

When I am trying to clear my mind and sleep they all haunt me.

We choose to forget bad experiences. We accidentally forget good experiences.

I've learnt that 'understanding' is such a tricky word.
To understand, does it mean that one totally expects another's character and don't rely the other anymore?
Or does it mean that one forgives and gives another chance, knowing that it is just another mistake.

--

I am afraid of letting her become one of them. The more I hold on to her, the more my imperfections drive her to become one of them. I have failed to protect her enough.

I was sure. But after hearing so many 'I don't know' from her, I began to doubt.

--

I've become so strong.

I've become so strong.

I laugh at mistakes.
I appreciate my ability not to be able to cry.
I acknowledge this gift of mine.

I am a monster now.
I gave you all the remnants of my heart, hoping that your purity can make me a human;
Yes it did, once or twice.

My human nature disappoint you many times.
You began to look at me through your perception.
You look at me through all the mistakes that I have done.

I want to start afresh.
I hope you can.

The little good things that I do for you becomes invisible, forgotten, unappreciated.
The mistakes that I've done get chained up with the mistakes I've did.
You link them altogether and view me through them all.

I can't cry.
I should position myself in places where it is challenging and tear-wrecking. Where tears are not needed, sympathy is not called for.
I will rise up to the occasion and be there.

Obama

I have never been more hopeful about America. And I ask you to sustain that hope.

I'm not talking about blind optimism, the kind of hope that just ignored the enormity of the tasks ahead or the roadblocks that stands in our path. I'm not talking about the wish idealism that allows us to just sit on the sideline or shirk from a fight.

We are not divided as our politics suggests. We're not as cynical as the pundits believe. We are greater than the sum of our individual ambitions, and we remain more than a collection of red states and blue states.

FREE

What comes to one's mind when a common word as this is mentioned?

As free as a bird?
Everything comes with a price?
Our basic freedoms as a human being? (speech, live, movement)
Having extra time on our hands?

This word is multifaceted. It's overly common usage and ubiquitous sightings made us all too familiar with it, to the extent of contempt. We forgot and neglect to fathom the deep meaning of this word. Not only are we blinded with familiarity, we are also cuffed with shackles of contempt.

We failed and fail to understand the truth that will set is free. The truth in the word 'free' that will set us free.

We all fight for the 'state of free':
As an individual, some of us fight for free time, we work harder so that we can do the things that we want and spend time with people that we cherish. We can't afford to SPEND time and be 'free' without being captive to our work. In exchange of our free time, we gain monetary remuneration.

The growth of this financial reward will determine our degree of financial freedom and the amount of free time that we have. To waste money is most foolish. To waste money so that we can waste time (ie time will pass faster when we are having fun) is a blunder.

Money held in our account are exchanged with time spent which can't be regained.

--- paused for action ---

I want to get out of this...

Lord I am impatient. Lord can I struggle with You until You have blessed me. I am here in KL with my girlfriend, I can't afford to go where she is. Can't afford to meet up with her.

I feel so pathetic again. I really hate this feeling that money is stopping me from achieving things...

Lord bless me. You know my heart. Am I ready to be blessed?

10 minus 1 is 0

As the lord taught one of the prophets through his wife, God is teaching me through Jolyn.

The 9 right and 1 careless (not mistake) that is not pardonable.

I admit to watching and m these few days without telling her, spiritually she can sense it, she got angry unknowingly. She can't even explain why. It is as if she knew and she was angry abt that. Remember how she was utterly disappointed. God would feel the same way, it would be so hard to reconcile, but for love.

Thank you God. Thank you Bei.

The 1 mistake will lead to disappointment, God will say the same thing, how can I rely on you? God needs a servant who is accountable and clean in all aspects.

Departures, Take-offs and Arrivals

Hardwork ideas

Instead of the ancient 一支香 to describe duration.
I want to learn how to measure my study time with 一支笔.

I want to find out how much it takes to finish a ballpoint ink pen.
Gotta start doing my notes on various things.

When I am back in Msia, I want to start my day early, breakfast, exercise and study.

Meetings, Building ups, See you soons...

Sending Bei off today.

She told me three things:
1) not to (study hard)
2) to miss her
3) to eat well.

She also told me that I have the keys to her heart. She trusts me, I know and I need to treasure this.

It is going to be 8months that we have been together. In 5 days. I must learn how to keep her close to my heart.

These 8months have been a good build ups. There have been moment of pain, moments of patience, moments of forgiveness and moments of fun and laughter.

When I send her off, I literally felt like a part of my soul tore. I could feel the tears well up. When she was making the turn towards the security check, I said to her for the last time in a month," Bei yang yi ke!"

In a months time, we will be in KL and Bangkok. Quite excited for that (:
----

I want to send flowers to her on the 26th. Perhaps this time I will send her a code.

Starting on different footing.

I was told by a wise woman that I was hardworking. But there is no point, because I am starting on different footing.

Compared to others, I am way behind.

So, white hare, this is a game of catch up!

Heart. Concealed. Invisible.
Hidden. Chest. Unreachable.

Unseen. Doubt. Existence.

WDIBTT?

WN,WDIDWTT?
WDIDTDTCT?
YSTISST, TYDTMWSTIS. WIAYWSTIS, YSN.

Promises to Bei. **

Bei. I am forgetful, I am selfish. I am sorry that ive hurt you and I will change.

I can feel your love. You care for me. I will only love you. I love you because ive found my other half. Please forgive me.

These are my promises:

I will work hard for you.
I will be strong for you.
I will always hold you no matter what, I will always be patient, I will never shout at you, I will never point at you.
I will listen to you the first time round and you don't need to repeat anything.
I will smile and be happy at your side.
I will try my best to understand.
I will always communicate with you.
I will never lie to you.

Brink-

Fucked up. Quarrelling because of something so small. (whenever we quarrel I feel invisible. You can smile and laugh after quarrelling. I seriously don't know how you do it.)

True love is one that would understand one another. Unrequited love is when one is blind the other is counting. Both should always count blessings.

I am counting my blessings. You are counting my flaws, remembering my promises. I remember yours, you don't remember mine.

Patience. Love. Understanding.

I have these for you. Do you have these for me?

Brink

Let it all drown
Let it fall and sink
Perhaps this frown
is a waste of ink.

You can still smile
as if it is fine.
So, all these while
it's just me and mine.

You are so close,
I am faraway
to becoming foes.
It is okay

to give up on
me.

IF

If you leave me...

I will never marry.
I will prove to you that you are my last love.

I love you.

I don't understand how you can say that you give up on me.

I don't give up in you. But after I hurt you and the more I try, the more promised I make to patch things. The more bridge I create, the more bridge there are to burn.

This is what I will do. I won't believe in true love anymore. I will live a life alone. Giving it to God and my family.. This is what will happen..

If you leave me.

Gold

In a sports match there is only one gold. Second place isn't lesser gold or smaller gold, it is silver.

From the glorious garnish to a lacklustre lacquer, a huge difference in recognition.

The bronze is out of comparison because the bronze is a victor too. He trumps fourth place who leave with nothing. A silver can't be compared with a bronze, it's stage is with the gold. In a way, the earth coloured bronze is a reward in its own.

When both the finalist fought to their death, and put in their best efforts, everything else would be left to 'fate' and 'form'. Fate would determine the lucky shots and 'coincidental' judgments. Form would determine the amount of amateur error one professional would make.


To the silver medalist a close call would highlight all his mistakes to gold. Whilst to a gold medalist the same match would highlight all the lucky shots he has made, mistakes don't matter anymore. Winning gold isn't a mistake. He is the victor, and he is thankful of all the fluke.

One would reflect, regret and be in remorse only when he knows he didn't get what he want. (I have noticed how much you want it, it is reflected in the choice of the shirt you were wearing) You have crowned yourself in gold, perhaps to tell yourself you are worth that......

We all have our reason for fighting. Some stronger than others. Perhaps fear and burden are insanely strong motivators.

The story of the Chanel bag.

Up in the shelf. Its gloss glistening in gold.

Up in the shelf. Seemingly out of reach. The sudden feeling of being pathetic and useless.

Up in the shelf. I don't seem to be comparable to those who can provide for their girlfriends.

Up in the shelf. At this point my piggy bank is still filled by change and pocket money by my parents.

Up in the shelf. The distance seems to be temptingly

Didn't do my homework again.

Met Alex for squash. First time going to that place. Yet I didn't do my homework how to get there. Found out last minute and estimated the timing really tight.

I was late for 15mins. /:

I will not buy myself another watch if I can't be early for 300days.

1000

1) 21/07 -

Jude 2-4
2 Mercy unto you, and peace, and love, be multiplied. 3 Beloved, when I gave all diligence to write unto you of the common salvation, it was needful for me to write unto you, and exhort you that ye should earnestly contend for the faith which was once delivered unto the saints. 4 For there are certain men crept in unawares, who were before of old ordained to this condemnation, ungodly men, turning the grace of our God into lasciviousness, and denying the only Lord God, and our Lord Jesus Christ.

Lord You are Your word. You are all powerful. Your word is all powerful. Speak to us through Your word. Hit us with your power. Amen.

2) 26/07 -

Gal2:16
Knowing that a man is not justified by the works of the law, but by the faith of Jesus Christ, even we have believed in Jesus Christ, that we might be justified by the faith of Christ, and not by the works of the law: for by the works of the law shall no flesh be justified.

3) 28/07

Phil4:6
Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.

4) 31st July
Behind Abraham’s attitude was his faith that God was ordering things. He believed God’s word to him “I am your very great reward” (Gen 15,1). There was no need for him to live a life of strain and anxiety about loss or gain. If he trusted God, God’s plan would work out in his affairs. He didn’t want to have what God didn’t want him to have. King David, a thousand years later found the same truth. He adopted Abraham’s outlook and enjoyed the great advantage of letting God take over. He wrote a song of surprised gratitude (2 Samuel 23) and described God’s plan for him in his house as being “ordered in all things and sure” (v.5). Jesus put the principle of Abraham into His famous promise of the Sermon on the Mount, Matthew 6:33. “Seek first the Kingdom God and his righteousness and all these things will be given you as well”. He said “Don’t worry about your life. Do not worry about tomorrow.” Blessed? REINHARD BONNKE

5) 2nd Aug

Eph 12 For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places. 13 Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand.

6) 12th Aug

Ezekiel 45:18 “Thus says the Lord GOD: In the first month, on the first day of the month, you shall take a bull from the herd without blemish, and purify the sanctuary. 19 The priest shall take some of the blood of the sin offering and put it on the doorposts of the temple, the four corners of the ledge of the altar, and the posts of the gate of the inner court. 20 You shall do the SAME on the seventh day of the month for anyone who has sinned through ERROR or IGNORANCE; so you shall make atonement for the temple.

[Can you believe it dad, error and ignorance is a sin. - but I see the significance of the blood of the bull: it takes away productivity. Bull used to give strength to the farmer, killing a bull would mean that planting and harvest would be slower. We are taking the longer cut if we use the short cut.

Place that the blood is placed: 2 temple doorpost, 4 sides of the altar, 2 posts of the inner courts. Those are ALL THE ENTRANCES: it would mean that we are reconciled with God and have access to Him again]

7) 13th Aug
1 Cor 3: 6 I have planted, Apollos watered; but God gave the increase.
16th Aug

8) Ephesians 1:4-6
According as he hath chosen us in him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and without blame before him in love: 5 Having predestinated us unto the adoption of children by Jesus Christ to himself, according to the good pleasure of his will, 6 To the praise of the glory of his grace, wherein he hath made us accepted in the beloved.

Out

B is out with her rich friends. (dinner and sing k) The dinner that I can't afford now. With people whom live in another world.

They bought her a coffee machine. One that is £500. Lied to her that his girlfriend wants one and that he broke up with his girlfriend.

There is a friend who has a car who will send her back.

And she went out borrowing £60 from PY.

Brink.

I have £3.
The journey to Holborn is £4.30.
My tubecard is left with £0.45.

I am late for my dining session.

What should I feel?

Neighbours

I am surrounded by humans who give up and those who succumb.

Laziness and sleepiness is something that we all have to fight against. This includes idleness.

I pray that I will always be focused and that I will hate idleness.

Up

Morning. She didnt want to hug me, then she wants to kiss me.

The last I kissed her she stared at me and said that she hates me. After that she started crying and refused to tell me why. She rather watch movie than talk to me.

So I didnt kiss her. Now she's watching her movie again. When I told her that the last I kiss her she go angry, she said that she don't have energy to deal with me.

She doesn't appreciate me whilst I am here. She always only wants it her way.

SZ

1) hardworking and brains
2) hardworking
3) brains
4) none.

Am meeting up with SZ. He taught me to be hardworking and happiness will come. Not seek for happiness as a goal. Because that won't come.

CK

I am at his / her brother's. At times like these when there are manipulative jerks, I regret that my credentials aren't higher or better than his.

An obvious basis of comparison that most of the time can't be helped.

When she shows me fear to appear in front of him. To me, it seems he still has a hold of her. Not that she hasn't gone over her, but he has a hold of her.

SZ

1) hardworking and brains
2) hardworking
3) brains
4) none.

Am meeting up with SZ. He taught me to be hardworking and happiness will come. Not seek for happiness as a goal. Because that won't come.

100 ways to motivate yourself.

No fix personality. - we change along the way.

Choices we make for our thinking - determines who we are.

True motivation, action is required.
Goal without action is a day dream.
Motion creates the self.

1) create a vision. Arnold Swar - Same process from body building. Who you wanna be and live as if you are already living it. Not wait for the vision.

2) tell a true lie. Lie to yourself, express it as a fantasy. Without a picture of your higher self

3) leave comfort zone. Only challenge will transform us. Change us and make us better. We are taught to be in the comfort zone - get out!

4) find your key. Master key to riches - Napoleon Hill. Spark the fire - completely rebuild thinking, thought by thought. New optimistic energy/ attitude. 'self disciple to take complete control of you mind, only thing with complete control is your mind'

5) plan your work. (too depress or upset for self creation) perfect time for creation - transmutation to change! Picture of who we want to be. Work energy of purpose. 1hr planning - 3hrs of planning. crisis reaction. Most crisis is result of failure to plan.

6) move your goal posts. Too small and too vague - large and specific power goal. The dream that drive you. the EFFECT the goal has on you.

7) dribble with your other hand. Usu. dominant hand. Not that you can't but you havent. Formation of a habit. Reprogram your habit of thinking. a) pessimistic vs b) optimistic. Change one thought at a time.

8) play your character. Thought processes - doing that character that we want to be. Eg Spock.

9) sit quietly completely alone. Observe insides coming out. Allow true dream in life to take clarity. Are you living your own dream or someone else's.

10) use the right chemicals. Energising chemicals in your system. Have fun!! Laugh, hug. Don't search for something fun. It is in yourself.

11) leave high school. Before high Sch we are creative dreamers. FEARING ppl think. across to look back. Defining life based on what others feel. Emerson: why shld the way I feel be determined by someone else.

12) lose face! Don't care abt what ppl think. . Reneo burgeon.

13) sing without feeling. Be a performer. Act like you already feel like you want to feel. We do not sing because we are happy but we sing because we are happy.

14) kill the television. Which side of the screen. Passively watching them having fun.

15) read yourself a story. Abraham Lincoln: read daily news aloud. Remember longer. Important material - read aloud.

16) get on our deathbed. Plan to do great things some day when we feel like it. Vividly imagine our last hours. Self motivation. Jesus!

17) be lazy to begin with. Henry Ford: break down the jobs to small pieces. Not how fast but you doing it. Irony: slower, finish faster! mental picture fast is not a happy mental picture.

18) politely walk away from those that don't support your goal. Kelvin Coolige- pessimist don't create.

19) create your own game. Coaches who response. Walls will create sideline. Let the game respond to you!!!

20) find your inner Einstein. Every human has the capacity of genius. Commit to using your imagination. Grown ups use their imagination for worrying (colourful picture) of the worse case scenario. dreaming is the design state of creation.

21) Feel good first. Feeling good until goal will make it no happen. Happiness is a right and it shouldn't be determine by our goals.

22) run towards your fear. Death kills us once. Fear kills us over and over again.

23) just be unexpected. We are all creative. Creativity is nothing to do with being original. Just be unexpected. Unexpected solutions !

24) create your relationship. Lucio - we can only fly embracing each other.

25) Be where you are. Most of us don't focus, we feel psychic chaos. Focus on what you want and it will come.

26) act like a hero. Not a sign of weakness but strength. What's possible for hero. Collect books. Let heroes life inspire you. Great self-motivation. Instead of looking up to hero, better to look into them.

27) everyone has willpower. Accept its existence. It is like a muscle. Not external but internal.

28) say no to yourself. Discipline - be your own disciple. See yourself as a stronger person. Self-respect. Abraham ?? Psychologist. Emerson. William - do 2 things that you don't want to do.

29) increase resolve. Use new word connection. Failure is success for weight lifting. Use the power of language.

30) reprogramme yourself. Delete all the negative story of the media. Be your own story. Be what's happening.

31)

Body language

Gesture before talking.

Point (gesture) and look in congruence. Eyes tell a lot. Where are you looking at.

Sit dress walk - tells who you are.

When saying something about a denial - shake your head.

Talk from the heart. Gesture by holding to the heart. SINCERITY.

(clap hands is a sign to fight)

Sincere smile.

Dr Paul Ekman.

Picture: genuine smile. Looks in the camera. Look like something has changed you.

Brows down anger and stress (jaws locked) Brows up - fear and surprise.

Take your audience to your level to understand how you feel. Be relaxed.

Remorse - closing eyes indicates thinking of what to say. Frown indicates stress.

Rubbing your thumb indicated self-assurance. In low self esteem.

VOICE: Speed rhythm. Pace tone. (modulated and slow)

Ronald Reagan - voice

Barrack Obama - 'you know what they say? They say.... This day will [never come]. They say.... [our sights were set too high]. They said...this country [was too divided]
Starts low - build up. THEN LET THE AUDIENCE HAVE IT.
Like a baptist preacher.
Voice become what you should feel. Feel something really powerful.

McCain - nasal voice: technician. Unadorned voice - congruent with what he says. Blunt and straight forward.

Hilary broke - the word election.

Layered voice analysis - LVA

Life is a lie.

All of us have internal voices. Our internal voice is our sense of direction. Our sense of direction would determine our character. Our character and who we want to be needs to come from our constant internal voices.

Our internal voice is our defense system. It makes us strong. It makes us who we are. We are who we are only when we have a unique character. (if not we will just be ordinary) Tell myself who I am.

When we are in the wrong. Only ourselves can 'console' us. Only we determine whether it is a lesson or guilt.

The best liar convinces himself. The one who can convince himself during times of need has the best defence.

The best liar is convinced for who he is. When one is convinced he has character and is confident. Being confident one become who he really think he is.

The best liar lives the best.

Costly lessons

Just got my results.

Not too bad for my efforts. If they can be called efforts at all.

Just don't feel like doing anything now.

Lesson learnt:
1) no more last min
2) no more being late.

Always plan ahead.

Lord...

Lord I know you are there. And I know j am being a demanding child. Speak to me now and show me the way. Would you just hold me in your arms?

The view of the journey.

On the way, one must stop to observe the sights.

Some of these scenes are enjoyable. Some of these passing views are picturesque.

We always have to learn how to slow down and enjoy the view.

Right now I am under the sun, sun-bathing. The best things in the world are free - the sun, the breeze, the sounds of the waves, the chill waters of the clear sea.

---

This trip has its ups and downs, like the hilly-roads in Santorini we had that as well. I dont want to narrate and recall such negative memories. Gatwick chair-plane-window seat-shout-blanket.

---

Perfection is sometimes easier than desiring to get the simple things right. Because there are variations to the definition of perfection. But to get the simple things right, the is no easy way out. That is - that.

---

I can't help but to compare myself some times. I feel like at this point i am not good enough.

But then again I am not putting in the effort to be better. I need to ensure that I am making the transactions.

I woke up earlier than usual today, but I went back to sleep. I need to learn how to do more productive things.

She has given me a mold and a fixed structure. She won't change much for me. Being adaptable, I will do the change. Work my way around the room that I have.

I would need to learn how to do things faster and explain myself clearer. I need to wipe anger off of my dictionary.

Purpose & Direction

Today and yesterday. I feel like I have lost all purpose and direction.

I don't know where I am heading and I don't know how to achieve them.

I used to be able to plan. I used to be able to express myself properly and succinctly. What has happened in the interim?

I don't really know where I am going ad well.

Is the addition in my life slowing me down? I feel like I am invisible to her some times. There are times where she doesn't need me and when she loathes
me. Totally hates it when she snaps at me 'go away'.

Most of the time i wait for her. I feel like I am not doing things at my own pace. And I am bound. Half the time I worry about our future, what I need to do for her and her family. I know they might not need my help and these are far fetched thinking. But these still occurs to me. It is the part of me that assumes responsibility and cares which did the thinking.

She doesn't know these.

I know I have sacrificed so much for her. Even some of my friends know it, but sometimes I feel like she doesn't realise it. I feel like I have nothing but her now.

Reduced to nothing and nobody.

When one breaks, one relearns. When one relearns, one restarts. When one restarts, it is as if it was back at the starting line. One who is back at the start is as if one didn't begin the journey at all.

Sometimes mending bridges are more difficult that building them.

Habits are hard to break. But I believe that it is slow and steady.

---

There is a same cycle that I can't break.

Sorted finally.

I got my things packed till the last minute.

1300h - this was the time that we aimed to shift out.
1730h - this was the eventual time we were at Kingstons.

I took 4hours and 30mins longer than I should. I have had packing experiences and I knew the last part was the hardest.

NTS: do not buy another magazine until I have finished the previous one. I have so many mags now.

Now I see how my money leaks to 'luxury' and waste. Do I really need it?

My brown tablelamp shelf did help me store things and put my speakers. My speakers did make the music more enjoyable. My sheepskin rug did make my floor more comfortable. My brown box not only prevented my bed from sliding it also stored stuffs.

I forgot to take a picture of my cleared up room. Nothing much actually - left with the bed, the wardrobe, the couch, the table and the chair. Should have taken for evidence so that we have proof, but didn't have the time. And I was shifting stuff to Tong's up till the last minute.

Thank God for Tong and Joel being so helpful. If not I wouldn't have a place to store my stuff temporarily whilst I move around.

I have just arrived in Paddington, now that I am here. My boxes are there with them as well as the stuffs that I want to dispose.

Textbooks are such a waste of money. I could save so much if I had been more hardworking and head to the library to study.

I wasted too much money. I could have save more.

NTS: plan ahead more!

Sorted without the 'ted'

Look at how slow I am packing.
All these years I've used one day or less to pack. And I had somewhere to rush to.

I always got my priorities wrong.

4 boxes this time.

And I need to buy a huge ass bag to throw all the junk in. Sieving through the junk takes ages too.

Wanted

I want to be able to give when needed. Not to prepare last minute 'when needed'. Someone else can give when I am merely preparing.

----

I was in York - Henry Moore, David Hockney, Burton gallery,

--

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim

---

I used to be so motivated at the start of term 2010.

Memories

I was in Barcelona.

We played IQ games along the way. Sketches behind the train tickets.

Memories

I was at Leeds.

Daydream at the JUNCTION

I am moving, shifting out of Cardiff now.

So much to get sorted I am overwhelmed. I need to pack and I am packing. I thought that it would be apt for me to make my first post today.

Seeing all the mess and packing through them just reminds me of how terrible this year went. ANOTHER yea that went by MESSY, UNORGANISED. I didn't kept the small things right. I didn't prepare for a handful of tutorials. I didn't make after-classes-notes as I've wanted to last year. I didn't file in my stuff right after one tutorial.

These are the before photos.

I am determined to sieve them through and change this aspect of myself.

The White Rabbit